What happens when we discount small actions or fear the possibility of humiliation?
We may not act at all. When we embrace both, we’re free to act. Any life-giving act, no matter how small, matters. According to Jesus, the Kingdom of God is like a mustard seed someone planted or like yeast a woman worked through a large amount of dough. Both the mustard seed and yeast required action from someone to bring about their potential. Both seed & yeast, the required action, and even the people may seem small and even hidden. Both may be small and hidden, but some actions require more (planting a seed is easier than kneading yeast through 60 lbs of dough!) Both contain big potential to benefit an entire community, offering nourishment in a variety of ways:
All of this from two small actions! If we're going to be sowers of seed and kneaders of the Bread of Life, know this... Action is never humiliation-proof. According to Fr. Richard Rohr, we're to pray for one good humiliation a day! What a way to stay humble and inevitably learn that humiliation is often a gateway to transformation! I promise you, especially if you, like me, are White (& an Enneagram One), it will happen as you enter into the on-going work of antiracism. Last fall, my daughter and I went to a weekend seminar to hear Nobel peace prize nominee, Fr. John Dear, talk about “Jesus as Peacemaker.” It’s been a constant part of our conversations ever since, becoming richer with insights from others. Earlier this year, Abby Buter pointed out the difference between being a “Peacekeeper” and a “Peacemaker” during the “Meditating with the Aramaic Beatitudes” class. The distinction is important…Jesus was the latter & said it’s the latter who are blessed. Fr. Dear gave my daughter a new language of nonviolence and she’s been quick to point out when I’m not (& other Christians aren’t) following in the footsteps of the nonviolent Jesus…oh the blessings of having a teenager in the house! But she’s right. And having it pointed out can be humiliating. When my children saw the video and photos of George Floyd, they were distraught. The conversation around Jesus and nonviolence needed to be taken to the next level. I decided to begin with my own faults and humiliations so they would learn not to fear their own. Around the dinner table, I told them stories from my own life of how I have thought, said, or did things that contributed to racism and upheld racist beliefs and systems. We talked about the reality of having inherited racist ideas as a culture and how Western Christianity’s own “superiority complex” has added to the problem by often making us overtly or covertly feel like we are definitely on the “winning team” and others are not. I told them of when I was a youth pastor and met with a community organizer after having spent time in Mississippi with Dr. John Perkins who encouraged me to do the same kind of community and racial reconciliation work with our students in our Missouri town rather than go elsewhere. Conversations with a couple of Black pastors in the area led me to talk to the Black community organizer. After telling him what I wanted to do, he laughed, and I felt humiliated. He pointed out how it was fine that I wanted to bring my students from the north side to the south side to help paint or whatever, BUT, it still didn’t change the fact that what the predominately Black kids on the south side were using as a community center was an old building that no one else wanted (but the kids were still happy to have) while the predominately White kids on the north side enjoyed a brand new top-of-the-line sports complex. It was an eye-opening conversation. Noticing my humiliation and naivete, he said, “I like you” then continued to challenge my White privilege. Doing “good work” and being a “good person” weren’t enough. At the end of our time, he still put me in touch with those who could help me line up service projects and then he sent me on my way (which included crossing a threshold I had no idea I would be crossing when I first walked in there). It was later that I could see how he was trying to open my eyes to the larger systemic problem of racial inequality and the problem of “White Savior Complex”--- our White Christian youth group would feel good about “helping” but the larger problems would still exist after we left (& in some cases our help would further uphold the problematic systems). Looking back, I’m grateful for the humiliation! Why?
Last month the opportunity to join an online discussion group facilitated by a Black friend from high school on the book, How to Be An Antiracist, came up. Aside: I've enjoyed listening to author, Ibram X. Kendi, read the audio version; often my kids listen, too. I knew a good humiliation (or more!) would come as I listened, shared, and became even more deeply aware of my ignorance both in high school and now (i.e. How did I not or how have I continued to not see, know, or consider this before?). However, experience tells me that humiliation need not stand in the way (and often is the way!). Do the conversations with family, friends, and neighbors matter? Does the discussion group matter? Refer to Jesus’ parables on the mustard seed and yeast. ______________ Two resources for ongoing learning, awareness & action:
Imagine walking into a doctor's exam room, telling the doctor your symptoms, showing the doctor what you're concerned about and then... turning around and leaving without letting the doctor respond! It may sound far-fetched to you but we do it all the time in prayer. Soren Kierkegaard the 19th century Danish philosopher, theologian and poet once said, "If I were a physician, and if I were allowed to prescribe just one remedy for all the ills of the modern world, I would prescribe silence. For even if the Word of God were proclaimed in the modern world, how could one hear it with so much noise? Therefore, create silence." How often do we turn to the Great Physician with our concerns, yet offer no opportunity for a response? With no response, how are we to know what we really are to say or do, especially in the face of tragedy and difficult circumstances? Oh, we may think we know what to say or do. Our ego self or what the Apostle Paul called "the flesh" always has an answer! This part of us likes to self-diagnose (and diagnose others!). It's usually quite sure of itself, quick to demonize those who do not agree, and usually lacks creativity, like choosing apathy. Apathy is quite different than active waiting, for the latter keeps vigilance while the former has "fallen asleep," sure to miss God's invitation to action when it does come! If we read I Corinthians 3:4-5 and simply turn each phrase of what love is to what it isn't, we get a quick and easy way to recognize when the ego is trying to take charge! The ego often... is not patient. is not kind. envies. boasts. is proud. is rude. is self-seeking. is easily angry. keeps a record of wrongs. It's hard to stop talking, look inside, and give up all of these ego-driven things in order to create space to listen to the One who truly knows the next word or action needed. Don't think it's difficult?
Words often arise from those very places when it comes to the difficult person or situation. BUT, if you can allow that part of the ego (the part that is impatient, for instance) to step aside or tone down, this creates space for silence where there's room for the Physician to speak. In the doctor's office, the doctor gives you instructions on what to do (or not to do) and the kind of medicine to take. Do you let the words go in one ear and out the other or go home and leave the prescription on your kitchen counter? No! Not if you trust the doctor. There is action involved beyond rehearsing your symptoms and having a prescription in hand. In prayer, not only is the word spoken to you by the Physician powerful, but the word given to you to speak (or do) carries that same healing power forward. Says, Henri Nouwen in The Way of the Heart, "A word with power is a word that comes out of silence. A word that bears fruit is a word that emerges from the silence and returns to it...A word that is not rooted in silence is a weak, powerless word that sounds like a "clashing cymbal or a booming gong." (I Corinthians 13:1) Our world is in desperate need of wisdom and healing. So many of us say, "I'm praying." What if we said, "I'm listening in prayer." Then, let's actually stop talking, go to a quiet place (like Jesus did), and find out what the Physician has to say. It's still Christmastide (the Christmas season also known as the Twelve Days of Christmas). And I'm curious how the celebration of the New Year and that of Epiphany (the culmination of Christmastide which happens on the 6th) go together. What conversation is provoked as I consider both? It's popular with the former to make "New Year's Resolutions" or in more recent years to choose a word (or allow a word to choose you!) for the year. With the latter, the Greek meaning of Epiphany has to do with "manifestation or appearance." Historically, liturgical churches (those whose communal worship is structured by the Christian/Church calendar year) celebrate two biblical stories of God and God's work made manifest through Jesus. The first story accounts for Epiphany also being called Three Kings' Day. These learned wise men (aka Magi), who studied the sky and nature's revelations, journey from their own country after a star appears indicating the birth of the King of the Jews. Noting the importance of such an incarnation, they follow the bright light which leads them to Jesus, whom they bow down and worship, offering gifts of gold, frankincense and myrhh, before returning to their own country (Matthew 2:1-12). The second story is Jesus' baptism in the Jordan River by John (Matthew 3:13-16, Mark 1:9-11, Luke 3:21-23). During this event, the triune God manifests--the Spirit descends like a dove and the Father's voice from heaven declares that this is His beloved Son. The baptism affirms Jesus' identity as well as initiates His work of making manifest the Kingdom of God in the world. Good news...it's not just Jesus' story, it's ours too! We're not only invited, we are a part of the conversation. Each of us is a "word made flesh" (invoking the description of Jesus in John 1:14). Poet and philosopher David Whyte says, "It's really quite remarkable that each of us is a conversation which will never ever appear again." Indeed, our appearance on the planet is miraculous. Every one of us offers a unique "face of God" incarnated to do good works which God has prepared in advance for us to do (Ephesians 2:10). The first week of the New Year is one of those times in our calendar year naturally provoking conversation. We get to consider the conversation we are and the one we're having with the world. It's a time when we're more apt to ponder life and its bigger questions, "Who am I?" "What have I been created to do?" "What word is God wanting to manifest through me?" "What do I really desire?" "What am I offering the world?" "What will I add or let go of this year?" "What conversations do I need to stop/start having?" "What journey am I to embark on or to courageously continue?" Do one of the questions grab your attention or is there another you'd like to add to the conversation? Perhaps you have been like me, sometimes trying to manifest someone else's word or way of being in the world. I have been prone to especially do this in the spiritual life, feeling pressure to be or believe a certain way or do a certain practice. But Jesus' own subversive conversation with the world and his message of freedom continuously beckons me to my God-created truer self, both in being and doing. So I want to help us shed some spiritual expectations in the New Year. Over the next few weeks I'll share what I have traded or am in the midst of letting go of in order to be a more authentic conversation in and with the world. Happy New Year and Epiphany blessings, friends. First up next Tuesday: Trading Daily Quiet-time Guilt for Pots & Pans |
AuthorKasey is a scarf, ball and club juggling spiritual director just outside of Nashville, TN. Play helps her Type-A, Enneagram 1 personality relax, creating space for poetry and other words to emerge. She also likes playing with theological ideas like perichoresis, and all the ways we're invited into this Triune dance. Archives
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